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    Latest Misheard Stories

    Artist: Statler Brothers

    Song: Eve

    The Story: Don't eat the fruit in the garden, Eden,, It wasn't in God's natural plan., You were only a rib,, And look at what you did,, To Adam, the father of Man.

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    Artist: Queens of the Stone Age

    Song: You Can't Quit Me Baby

    The Story: You smell like goat, I'll see you in hell

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    Artist: Starship

    Song: Sarah

    The Story: All the b***h had said, all been washed in black

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    Artist: Iron Maiden

    Song: The Prisoner

    The Story: And my blunt is my ho now

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    Artist: Pearl Jam

    Song: Jeremy

    The Story: At home, drawing pictures, Of mounds of tots, With ham on top

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    You don't have to say I'm lovely
    Just because I am

    Real Lyric: You don't have to say you love meJust be close at hand

    The story:

    As a teenager I thought the lovely Dusty was arrogant and conceited because of the words to her song. Years later I was on an induction course for the Armed Forces bulling my boots and blancoing my webbing - a very tedious job - and listening to Dusty on my Walkman and singing along and I was aware that the other guys were pissing themselves laughing and they explained in words of one syllable what the real lyrics were. Squaddies are not the most sensitive and sympathtic people in the world.

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