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    Latest Misheard Stories

    Artist: Statler Brothers

    Song: Eve

    The Story: Don't eat the fruit in the garden, Eden,, It wasn't in God's natural plan., You were only a rib,, And look at what you did,, To Adam, the father of Man.

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    Artist: Queens of the Stone Age

    Song: You Can't Quit Me Baby

    The Story: You smell like goat, I'll see you in hell

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    Artist: Starship

    Song: Sarah

    The Story: All the b***h had said, all been washed in black

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    Artist: Iron Maiden

    Song: The Prisoner

    The Story: And my blunt is my ho now

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    Artist: Pearl Jam

    Song: Jeremy

    The Story: At home, drawing pictures, Of mounds of tots, With ham on top

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    Day divides the night,
    Ninety pints a day.
    Tried to run etc...

    Artist: Doors
    Real Lyric: You know the day destroys the night,Night divides the day.Tried to run, tried to hide,Break on through to the other side.



    The story:

    Background: For the US readers amongst us I ought to point out that a pint in England is a pint of beer (about 20oz).

    For years I laboured under this misapprehension and was finally caught out when overheard shouting it very loudly while singing along drunkenly at a party.

    A rather officious and annoying guy (he was trying to hit on a girl I had a crush on so, naturally, he was officious and annoying as well as ugly and stupid) loudly and carefully challenged my rendition and then when I hesitantly repeated my version with a sinking heart (brought on by his gleeful expression) pointed out my mistake in front of aforementioned girl.

    Luckily she saw the funny side and we are now married.

    My version makes far more sense, as anyone who has ever drunk more than 9 pints will testify. After drinking that much you very well may have 'tried' to run and 'tried' to hide (please note the emphasis on 'tried' as your actual success would be limited) and having died of certain alcohol poisoning, would have definitely broken on through to the other side.

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